The Psychology of Passing Exams (Part-5)

SELF-TALK

We can do anything we want to do if we stick to it long enough.
Helen Keller.

Another application of affirmations is self-talk. You are constantly having an internal dialogue with yourself about events which are occurring in your internal and external envioronmental. The self-talk has a very strong effect on emotions and behavior. It usually happens subconsciously but with practice you can learn to listen to it and control it. Most of the inner dialogue is negative, e.g., ‘I can’t do it. I’m not good enough. I’ll mess it up. It’s too hard. There is no point going on. They’ll that I’m stupid and useless’ and so on. Negative self-talk creates pressure.

The candidate in a pressure situation, e.g., unable to answer a question in the long case, may:

1. Magnify the obstacles and underestimate his or her own resources;

2. Think irrationally and feel the examiners dislike and are ‘out to get’ him or her:

3. Visualize the outcome he or she fears or doesn’t want to happen and not concentrate on what he or she wants to achieve;

4. Try too hard with ‘do nots’ and ‘must nots’; and

5. Worry about criticism, rejection by others and embarrassment.

Self defeating thoughts are difficult but not impossible to control. Some of the strategies used are as follows.

1. Repeating negative thoughts aloud as soon as they come to mind helps some individuals get rid of them.

2. Thought-stopping. As soon as you are aware of negative thoughts, say ‘STOP!’ ‘CANCEL!’ and/or imagine a red light or the word ‘STOP!’ and then focus on something else such as your breathing. Another technique is to wear an elastic band around the wrist, and to pull and flick it each time a self-defeating thoughts comes to mind.

3. Being aware that everyone has negative thoughts, particularly in pressure situations, helps to lessen their impact.

4. If you fight negative thoughts, you concentrate on them and make them worse. You need to replace them with positive thoughts.

5. Encouraging negative thoughts to go through your mind and then allowing them to pass out may also get rid of them, e.g., saying to yourself ‘Come on, I’m waiting for you’.

6. Asking yourself question such as ‘Why am I doing this?; ‘What’s my plan?; ‘What do I have to do now?; What’s the worst thing that can happen?’ may also reduce self-defeating thoughts.

7. You can stop undesirable self-talk by taking a few slow deep breaths and thinking positive affirmations. For example, say to yourself ‘Take a few deep breaths, relax and take control’; ‘You can do it!; Relax and flow’; ‘Slow down’; ‘I perform better under pressure’.